Why oh why am I not Narnian?
Published by J. M. Adkison under on 6:40 PM
Once you get past the blood-thirsty ice queen, the murderous uncle, and the fact that a little girl gets lured too easilyt into the lair of a shirtless fawn-Narnia seems like a really nice place.
For one thing: talking animals
For two things: Castles-cool ones
For three things:Aslan
For four things: If you're human-you're basically king
For five things: No pesky internet classes
Right now I should be working on a massive project for my internet communications class (the biggest regret of my schedule). We're supposed to be designing an entire website. It could be fun-right? Wrong! We have to deal with the boring, hard stuff called HTML. HTML-hypertext markup language-is one persnickety old wench that doesn't work right if you forget a semicolon out of 1,000 lines of code. The fact that so much code goes into the simplest website makes my brain angry. Angry because humans seem to make everything so stinkin complex. Let's take medical/anatomy terms.
For example: "The major neuroendocrine control centre of malacostracans is the X-organ–sinus-gland complex, which lies in the eyestalk or in an equivalent part of the head in which the eyes are sessile."
Who comes up with stuff: robots? Nancy Pelosi? Lex Luthor?
Why can't you just name stuff short names, like: the foop, the zoob, the yaak, the nama, the Gooop. That would make the world a whole lot easier to understand. Life is short-we don't need long terms.
Back to Narnia and its lack of the internet (and modern technology)-yes, technology was supposed to make our lives easier (and yes I know without the internet and technology I would not be typing this right now), but it just gives us a chance to be busier. Now that we can see the world wide web on our cell phones-big corporations that use employees as fine cutlery to grab their food (money), can now keep feeding whenever they feel like and keep those utensils a workin'.
We love to be busy-and our bosses expect us to love it so much-we buy a pull-out mattress for our office. Sure-you have a nice window view of the city, but that doesn't come in handy when you're trying to get a nice sleep.
Narnia looks so pristine, so untouched, so peaceful. I can imagine myself relaxing in the castle tower having a deep theological discussion with a burmese python-actually, I hate pythons, perhaps my st. bernard Sweet Pea.
Which is why I want to be a writer. It is an occupation that can be done from anywhere: home, plane, train, river side, in a boat, in a mote, wearing a coat. By the shore, at the store, standing in an open door. Eating apples, drinking snapple, listening to old women cackle. Okay, maybe I'm getting out of hand-but a writer's life looks simplistic-no cubicles, no cruel upper management, no board meetings-just you, a piece of paper and your creativity.
And a castle in Narnia would be the perfect place for a masterpiece.
For one thing: talking animals
For two things: Castles-cool ones
For three things:Aslan
For four things: If you're human-you're basically king
For five things: No pesky internet classes
Right now I should be working on a massive project for my internet communications class (the biggest regret of my schedule). We're supposed to be designing an entire website. It could be fun-right? Wrong! We have to deal with the boring, hard stuff called HTML. HTML-hypertext markup language-is one persnickety old wench that doesn't work right if you forget a semicolon out of 1,000 lines of code. The fact that so much code goes into the simplest website makes my brain angry. Angry because humans seem to make everything so stinkin complex. Let's take medical/anatomy terms.
For example: "The major neuroendocrine control centre of malacostracans is the X-organ–sinus-gland complex, which lies in the eyestalk or in an equivalent part of the head in which the eyes are sessile."
Who comes up with stuff: robots? Nancy Pelosi? Lex Luthor?
Why can't you just name stuff short names, like: the foop, the zoob, the yaak, the nama, the Gooop. That would make the world a whole lot easier to understand. Life is short-we don't need long terms.
Back to Narnia and its lack of the internet (and modern technology)-yes, technology was supposed to make our lives easier (and yes I know without the internet and technology I would not be typing this right now), but it just gives us a chance to be busier. Now that we can see the world wide web on our cell phones-big corporations that use employees as fine cutlery to grab their food (money), can now keep feeding whenever they feel like and keep those utensils a workin'.
We love to be busy-and our bosses expect us to love it so much-we buy a pull-out mattress for our office. Sure-you have a nice window view of the city, but that doesn't come in handy when you're trying to get a nice sleep.
Narnia looks so pristine, so untouched, so peaceful. I can imagine myself relaxing in the castle tower having a deep theological discussion with a burmese python-actually, I hate pythons, perhaps my st. bernard Sweet Pea.
Which is why I want to be a writer. It is an occupation that can be done from anywhere: home, plane, train, river side, in a boat, in a mote, wearing a coat. By the shore, at the store, standing in an open door. Eating apples, drinking snapple, listening to old women cackle. Okay, maybe I'm getting out of hand-but a writer's life looks simplistic-no cubicles, no cruel upper management, no board meetings-just you, a piece of paper and your creativity.
And a castle in Narnia would be the perfect place for a masterpiece.
1 comments:
Of course, sometimes that sheet of paper can look absolutely terrifying....
Which apparently seems to be what's going on with you and your keyboard, since you have no blogged in FORevER. :P
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