The Devil in the Laundry Mat

The Devil's been in the laundry mat and I am mad as....AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

I have been the victim of a robbery. A stupid, pointless robbery that never, ever should have happened.

I was doing my long-over-due laundry like any normal college student should. I was washing my own, personal clothes. Not waiting for other people to wash their clothes, then take them, but washing my own clothes for me to wear. I left the laundry mat to go study, then returned to put my five loads in the dries-left for dinner-went back to dry them again because the new driers were all used up and I had to use the old ones (which are stupid).

I went back to my room for a little Sunday R & R. Then, I went back to get my clothes and fold them up. Only, they were missing. Not all of my clothes, just the ones that really (oh so coincidentally) matter. My favorite, beloved, fashionably-awesome and very comfortable Hollister zip-up jacket had been stolen. I searched the laundry mat, ripping open washer machines, tearing through piles of clothes, ready to scream at the top of my lungs. I HATE THIEVES!

Those jackets were not just any old jackets-they were gifts from my mother-and gifts from your mother are not just gifts. My favorite, the red one, I had picked out for Christmas and I remember not being able to wear till Christmas. I HATE THIEVES!

Why me? Why my stuff? Why did they have to steal? Did they have nothing better to do? Did they suddenly forget they were at Harding-where this kind of stuff isn't suppose to happen? Why me? Why? Why? Why?

my first reaction was to rain down all sorts of misfortune unto whoever wronged me: ranging from facial-scarring skin diseases to economic failure to sterility. I was that mad. But, then I realized that that would border on occult pass-times so I decided that would not be the best release for my anger.

My next reaction was to call my sister, Abbie, who usually sits and pretends to pay attention to me when I rant-but she helps me get it off my chest. But the stupid time difference between here and Maine is an hour and so Abbie would already be asleep.

So I decided to blog my anger. Here's my rant Planet Earth and I'm mad as a hornet given a machine gun and hooked up on emotional steroids.

I realize its not the biggest thing to be mad about-but it's the whole invasion of privacy in a public place that gets me mad.

I'm trying to forgive my wrong-doers, but I just want to have my jackets back. My friends at Harding know-I wear them everywhere! Even if Fidel Castro himself were to show up at my door with my jackets-I would be his best friend.

But until then-it looks like that I'm going to have to fume for a while. And continue listening to Kelly Clarkson songs (she is good at singing while angry).

As a side note to my wrong-doer...If I see you on campus with my jacket-I am going to get you!!! Not only will I release my anger upon you for stealing my jacket, but I will unleash all the anger that's been building up at Ohio for forcing me to give up my accent, at all those kids in middle school who left me to sit by myself looking like an idiot, at Maine weather for forcing me to waste my and my family's good time by shoveling too many feet of snow, at the guy who built our house because it is already beginning to fall apart, at those idiotic African despots who are just evil, and at Marvel comics for killing off Captain America. AHHHHHHHHHHHH!

In short: I'll get you. When you least expect it.

Wow-that felt good to get off my chest!